As I reflect on the year 2013 I realize that it was an amazing year! Good Bye 2013 and Hello 2014! Happy New Year!
Every year people who want to make ‘improvements’ in their lives set New Year’s resolutions. Most people fail, few succeed. Those who fail, try again the following year or become non-believers. I wrote an article in 2010 about Why not to Set a new Year’s resolution! (Don’t judge the article by it’s title. It’s not what you would expect)
This year I have really not set a New Year’s resolution, in fact I don’t even have expectations on what I would like to accomplish in 2014. I have no goals, no plans. I’m just going to live 2014 as each day comes – let’s experiment.
I came across a link posted by a friend on Facebook which I think is the best advice I’ve gotten on the topic of “New Year’s Resolution”. All the lessons in this article are pure gold! I had to learn it the hard way by experience and by learning from mistakes, but is that not he best way to learn.
I hope you get something out of it. I must say, not all of you will ‘get it’. In fact I would not have gotten all of it if I had come across this article last year.
Suno gau vaalo!(Hear me, hear me)…We’ve been duped by our elders (who in all fairness probably didn’t even know! :P). For years children have been frightened into waking up before sun rise, bathe and get dressed and do pooja else face some very dark and evil happenings. Kali Chaudas has always been portrayed as something bad.
In fact it is something to be celebrated. I say Since after Diwali comes a New Year. Kali Chaudas should be a day of setting New Year’s Resolutions!
Kali means Dark (eternal) and Chaudas – Fourteenth. Thus, celebrated on the 14th day of the dark half of Kartik month, Kali Chaudas is the day allotted to the worship of Mahakali or Shakti and is believed that on this day Kali killed the most wicked Narakasura. Also referred to as Naraka-Chaturdashi, Kali Chaudas is day to abolish laziness and evil which create hell in our life and shine light on life. The strength to protect others is referred as Kali, and if its used for God’s work is called Maha-kali.
Two weeks ago I was at a mall rushing to the store that I wanted to go to in the last 7 minutes before the mall shuts down. While zooming past those stalls that are laid like little lego bricks between the two parallel rows of stores that usually sell smaller priced accessories like cell phone cases, purses, no name brand sun glasses etc…I heard a call from one of those vendors. I don’t remember what the man said, but it caught my attention.
He begun his above average, metering towards impressive sales act which I am sure he had rehearsed many times before, but one that hardly seemed like a script. It seemed more like a natural or a well crafted script that seemed to be a pretty good recipe of passion for the product and an understanding of a fairly good enough technique of persuasion.
He was selling a portable wireless speaker small enough to fit in one’s pocket and one that used bluetooth to pair with a device like a phone or an IPod to stream live music.
He demonstrated the features and sound quality in the next 2 to 3 minutes. He then said, “since it’s closing time, I’m going to give you a great deal. This usually sells for $80, but I’m going to make this a final sale for tonight and because I really want you to have this great product, I’m going to make it $40 just for you!”
That’s fine, right? We have all heard something like this at some point in our lives. In my mind I started searching for ways in which I could use this product. I told him “Okay, I’ll buy it”
He started to pack the speaker that he was holding in his hand. I stopped and asked him if there were any other colors. I could see a yellow one and a black one behind the glass of his merchandise cart. He said “Yes” and then moved on to show me different colors, but I happened to like the color of the one that he used to do the little demonstration for me. He started packing it again. I asked him to give me a new pack, I then asked him about the “store’s” return policy, which turned out to be “No Refunds – Exchange only”, which is still fair, right?
But I thought, if that is the case, I want to make sure the speaker is working properly. That is when things started going downhill. He’s attitude changed from a person who was passionate about the product(or passionate about selling that product) to an attitude of someone who was being overly defensive.
He said, “Oh I cannot open the box for you. It is company policy”. My obvious argument was, “What if the speaker is defective”, to which he replied “But I can’t open it for you”.
When he saw that I had started to put my wallet back into my pocket, he said, “Okay, I’ll open it on for you”. But being a reasonably smart shopper I persuaded him to turn it on.
He hesitantly hooked up the speaker to the power source and a red light appeared on the speaker.
“See, it’s working”, he said with an expression on his face which I could only describe as “relieved”.
At this point, I had already gone from “hmmm…Interesting ..” to “hmm… something’s fishy”.
I then asked him to play some music on that speaker. He refused!
“It is working! You see this red light. It means it is working”
“It’s a speaker, not a lamp. How can I tell if the speaker is working properly without listening to the sound it produces”
He did not budge, and insisted that I buy the product, and started to scan the item. I stopped him, and said, “In that case, I don’t want to buy this” and I started walking away while thinking I probably need to check this brand online to see what kind of reviews it has and if there were any other alternatives.
From behind me, I heard the man say, “Wow… what a waste of time!”
What did you say?
I turned around and said, “What did you say?”
What happened next can only be described as a knock-out combo move of words in angry ninja style.
I told him what he did was wrong. I tried to explain to him, this what he did there was not good salesmanship. I could have easily gone home and come back the next day and bought that very product from him. But do you think I did that? No!
That person seemed like this guy:
And when the sale didn’t go through, turned into this guy:
Which just led me to conclude that he was this guy all along:
A truly remarkable salesman is not necessarily one who closes the most deals – that viewpoint can only get you to a B+, or maybe an A if they’re lucky, but never A+. I suggest you try this: If you are planning on buying a product or service that requires you to have a long term relationship with the person selling that product or service, test them. Ask the hard questions, get close to a deal, then back off, and tell them you need some time to think about it. Watch their reaction, because there is nothing worse for a salesperson then when the customer walks away just before closing the deal. Doing this will test their patience and their commitment towards you.
I have had clients get so close to a deal and then walk away only to return after weeks or even months to start the project with a bang! The most memorable case was one in which the hiring manager of a company phoned me asking for another meeting to finally start a project that they were planning for a very long time. The strange thing was, I had forgotten all about this project. The client had come back to me after a year and a half! They were just not ready to take on the project when we had our first discussion. That client is still with my company and has even brought in numerous others!
Before you start reading this article, please note that all this will not make any sense whatsoever if you don’t know what Suits is. Suits is a legal drama television show which in highly technical jargon is Awesome! In fact, it is so awesome, if there were only 2 shows that I could recommend that my beloved readers can watch, it would be Suits and Under The Dome .
People who actually watch Suits, let’s face it, as much as I love the kick-but intellectual and social kung-fu action that Suits is, the show would not be what it is if it were not for it’s love affairs. In fact, the Season 3 finale was all about the Suits Love Affair: Louis and Sheila, Harvey and Scotty, and Mike and Rachael.
So that led to this: A compilation of the Suits Love Affair ( I got a kick out of this one myself)
The Obvious one of course is Mike and Rachael:
The Complicated Harvey and Scotty:
The short lived Donna and Stephen that makes you go, Ohhh,…aah… and then damn… that son of B***:
The awkward and weird made for each other Louis and Sheila:
The power struggle and troubled ‘marriage’ of Jessica and Darby:
Nigel and His Cat:
.
These two haven’t met, but their common arch nemesis Harvey and their snake like personality would make them perfect of each other – Tanner and Cameron:
However the real Love Affairs are the following:
The tag team bromance of Mike and Harvey:
Jessica and Control:
Ava Hessington and Hessington Oil:
Louis Litt and Interns:
Rachael and Law Degree:
Donna and Donna: ‘Cause she’s that awesome!
So that’s my take on the Suits Love Affairs! What’s yours? If you like this post, please share it and leave a comment below!
For all those who don't know, the new Miss America 2014 is of Indian Origin.
Miss America 2014 winner Nina Davuluri
So this is what is happening on twitter: According to some Americans on Twitter, the new Miss America is not American, but an Arab Terrorist. Then there are people who are calling all Indians terrorists and some are bringing in Barak Obama, as if it was his "fault" ~ Some Twitter user. Some brilliantly connecting the tragedy of 911 to an Indian-American girl who won a pageant.
Then there are some who are reminding Americans that they're all immigrants, and if going by calling the new Miss America "not an American", then they're all "not American".
Then there are people(Indians and non-Indians) pointing out that India is not Arab while at the same time, somehow managing (or apparently) degrading Arabs, which led to some presumably Arabs bad mouthing Indians.
Here is an Interesting tweet, which clearly is on the Indian defensive side by pointing out "We" are not "Them".
Anil Dash points out a reality that a lot of Indians living in America might actually be facing:
However this post particularly hit home when it comes to prejudice against Indians, which ironically comes from within India and is prominent within the Indian community more than anywhere outside of it. The fact that Indians with darker skin are discriminated in India and by Indians outside of India because they are "Too Indian"!
Another interesting topic that came out was the question of whether beauty pageants like Miss America should even exists. The unrealistic expectations that girls face today regarding physical beauty, weight issues and the general objectification of women. There were also questions raised on the validity and fairness of the contest.
This one kind of makes me appreciate the fact that I'm Canadian! Lorin Lee, we'll be happy to welcome you. 🙂
This one is witty:
Then there is the typical mob mentality where everyone is bashing everyone else:
Americans getting bashed:
Here's an interesting post. This gentleman shuns racists, but does it in “all but wrong” fashion – Arab getting bashed.
Which leads to this twitter, responding in an equally interesting manner. Indians getting bashed by Arab:
This person really needs to work on their disses – she made me laugh.
But for those who think this is all but too depressing, never fear,Twitter has it all covered, so on a lighter note, these following tweets made me laugh:
Here is one of my favourites – Quite clever way to be able to laugh at a classic stereotype that affects him.
So what's Kapil's take on this. I personally don't have much use for such beauty pageants, but I think the new Miss America, Nina Davuluri has her work cut out for her. Not only is she now Miss America, but she is the first Miss America of Indian Origin (I say that as if I'm expecting to see more Indian-American Miss Americas, but hey, how knows? Right?), on top of that she is already a target for racists across her country, but this also means she will have more support from her fellow Americans who may feel the need to stand up to racism.
The reality is that it is difficult for a person of Indian origin to be a public figure outside of India. She will have to work twice as hard and take extreme precautions to stay away from controversies and scandals.
And of course, no pressure but she's not just representing America, she'll also be representing NRIs across the globe. But then diamonds are only formed under extreme pressure! Good Luck Nina Davuluri!
On Saturday, September 7th ,2013, I performed a mix of Hindi and English prose at ShriKshatriyaMitraMandal, Toronto's (SKMM Toronto) annual function at Rose Theatre in Brampton, Ontario, Canada.
Zindagi Enigma is philosophical examination of the life of an individual from the birth of his child going backwards in time, meeting his soul mate, starting work and experiencing uncertainties of his career, going to college while searching for him identity, conflicts with religious beliefs handed down to him, falling in love for the first time, growing up as child, and then finally his first breathe at birth and then it all begins – The Greatest Show on Earth.
Due to time constraints, the act was cut short. If I get a chance, I shall post record the full version some day, but for this, enjoy! 🙂
For those who have asked me whether this is story is based on my life, the answer is no. This story and the characters in it are fictitious and any resemblance to any person, living or dead is purely coincidental.
I can see that a lot of people are having a hard time keeping a smiling face when they talk about winter, the snow and the wind because they're thinking about the cold, the slush, and layers of clothes and shoveling. I'm one of those people who really seem to be enjoying this year's winter. I understand that I might be getting a few frowns as people read this because I work indoors most of the time and yes I do not need to commute because I work from home. But hear me out, will you?
I couldn't get much work done yesterday, so at night I went to the nearby 24 hour Tim Hortons, a Canadian favorite coffee shop to have a warm cup of Cafe Mocha and to get some work done. Ask any Canadian and they'll know the name 'Tim Hortons' it because it's a common name mentioned almost daily in Canadian households. I came home at around 1:30am. It's at most 20 feet from my driveway to the door of my house and within that short distance I began to feel the cold reaching into my legs beneath the multiple layers of clothing. I could feel my cheeks freezing. The coffee had not awaken me up as much as the cold hitting my face did. It was a good feeling.
There was no one on the street, there was silence – my conjecture was that it was so cold that it was difficult for much of the sound to travel. The snow had settled on the ground like icing on a birthday cake and the whole street was lit up with the light from the street lamp that it reflected. I stood there for a few minutes in awe.
Just a few weeks ago someone commented that I was a bit shy. That came as a bit of a surprise to me as I do not consider myself as even a remotely shy person. After a bit of reflection I realized that at some point in my life that in fact may have been true from one perspective and even today to some this may hold true. I do not usually tend to speak unnecessarily. If I do not bother speaking up, it is mainly because the situation or topic at hand does not interest me or I do not have anything worthwhile to add to the conversation because it does not add any additional positive value.
Although I have a blog which may seem like an open expression of my personal thoughts, a twitter page which paints a picture of what goes in my mind and a Facebook account where it may seem that I share my intimate thoughts amongst my Facebook friends, it is only what one sees on the surface. I have learnt from experience that things are not always what they seem. I like to express myself freely when the time calls for it, but my biggest breakthroughs in thinking and understanding have come from seeking solace in solitude.
I like to deal with certain things like figuring personal and business solutions to problems I face on my own,. The bigger the problem the more silence it requires. But the fact is, this is not just true for me – this is true for everyone. Even the most extreme cases of extroverts need to at times find their inner voice in seclusion.
The key here is not to categorize oneself as either an introvert or an extrovert. There are different times that requires one to taken on introvert or an extrovert traits.
When making business deals, giving speeches in public, working in teams I have to take on an extrovert persona and during planning, projecting, writing or doing any kind of creative work I have to take on an introvert persona. The key is to realize one's natural state and then balancing it according to the situation that one is in.
Let's remember our fallen soldiers. A few pay the price with their lives so that the rest can enjoy safety and freedom. But really being the so-called evolved species how is it that we can't take peace, cooperation and unity over this divide that is ever so present.
What is this progress of building cities, expanding our scientific knowledge and building wealth if we can't stop ourselves from blowing each other up?
Yes, it's because of those soldiers that sacrificed their lives that we enjoy this freedom, but do the few have to die in order for the rest to have it?
Two years ago, I wrote an article on "Why not to Set a new Year’s resolution!". Now I like to catch people's attention like that. The fact was that I was not telling people to not set new year's resolutions, but instead I was showing why you should set them in November.
It has worked well for me and I have made some amazing changes in the past two years. Some of my friends and colleagues have also adopted this out-of-the-box way of making self improvements.
Now remember, you do not need to restrict yourself to health goals like losing X pounds or just financial goals like earning $Y within the next Z months. You can set new year's resolutions for your company, for your community, for your family or for your circle of friends .
Just a few weeks ago someone commented that I was a bit shy. That came as a bit of a surprise to me as I do not consider myself as even a remotely shy person. After a bit of reflection I realized that at some point in my life that in fact may have been true from one perspective and even today to some this may hold true. I do not usually tend to speak unnecessarily. If I do not bother speaking up, it is mainly because the situation or topic at hand does not interest me or I do not have anything worthwhile to add to the conversation because it does not add any additional positive value.
Two years ago, I wrote an article on